Wednesday, July 17, 2013

Learning Discipline

I'm lacking discipline.

I see it in the corners of my life that I try to hide. The moments of solitude that I let slip away, filling them with useless hours upon hours of TV. The bites of food that I "know I shouldn't eat" but do anyway. The numerous convictions at night that have fled by the dawn. Half filled journals, unfinished books scattered across the floor.

I have owned a Bible for over 1/2 my life... and I don't think I've ever read the book of Amos.

I wanted to be disciplined. a disciple. One who follows in Your path. To live a life of thanksgiving, of prayer, of joy, of trust. To realize that You reveal yourself to those who ask, seek, knock.

Lord, I know that I start and I stop. and I start and I stop. and I start and I stop. That my walk with you has been lurching, stumbling. That there have been days, weeks, months where I haven't moved.

Jesus, thank you. Thank you that you wait. that you never let go, give up or move away. That you still love me with a burning passion, despite my wandering eyes, my impatient heart.

I want to be disciplined. To find my Hope, my Peace, my Rest in You. to cling to Your Promises.

the Joy Dare. Day One.

3 Gifts learned

1. Nothing is as satisfying as the knowledge that you have acted as God would have you

2. That Love Always Wins

3. How to read, to write, to communicate