I am officially a collector at the water bottling company. No, I didn't take them up on their offer to hire me, so my paycheck is still signed by my temp agency, but I have my own accounts, phone line and email with the company name in it.
I know I'm here because I'm afraid. I was afraid of being unemployed when I returned from Uganda, so I just applied for jobs. Afraid I wasn't qualified for more so I took the first one offered. Afraid of just quitting and not finding anything worthwhile to fill with my time...
I know I'm not trapped by my circumstances. That I could quit tomorrow. That the only thing holding me to my desk is my own fears and insecurities about what I should be doing instead. I keep saying I'll be quitting in the fall (and I will, because I am going on my roadtrip), but I have absolutely no idea what I'll do after that... I don't want to fall into the same trap of just doing anything.
sigh. I'm feeling very disappointed in my own inabilities to just get over my fears and quit and find a job, a vocation, a something... boo.
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