a decidedly non apolegtic entry

we all know I haven't posted in awhile. I really don't have any new or better excuses, so I'm not going to give any. Sorry for not being more communicative. I love you all. :)

I feel like I'm changing here. Which is probably the biggest "no duh" statement of the year. I think if I wasn't changed by this experience, I wouldn't be human. I'm becoming braver, more sure of myself. More questioning of my own motivations, more enthusiastic about the future. I laugh just as regularly, but oddly enough, I cry less. I feel the undercurrent of God's delight in creation more often. I talk less, listen more intently, and think so much that sleep eludes me from 2-3am everynight.

I have less answers and more questions, but I'm more willing to accept uncertainties. I'm depending more on God, more on others... but learning that I can stand strong alone.

This will probably make little sense to anyone but myself... so I'll stop waxing poetic and tell you more about what I've been up to...

We went to Jinja last weekend, where I went White Water Rafting for the first time. It was a lot of fun, but I'm not "hooked for life." I just think it's exceedingly cool to be able to say I've white rafted on the Nile. My favorite part wasn't the rapids, though. At one point, we were able to get out of the raft and swim in the Nile. It was amazing. The current just swept us along, we all agreed it was the closet to flying as we'll ever come. And as the sun started to set, casting the long shadows of the trees across the water, a feeling of peace and calm settled within my entire being, and I felt closer to God than I have in such a long time. It's so nice that we get to delight in Him so fully.

This past week I've really been studying Luo. It's coming along frustratingly slow, but I want to learn so bad. Patricia has been tutoring me... I feel like I'm back in Spanish class. I write paragraphs at night, and she grades them for me the next morning. It's difficult, but I have so much motivation to learn. I want to be able to sing and play with the children on the way home from work, and they all speak Luo. Besides, I'm tired of people having to translate all the wedding proposals I've been getting... I'd rather handle them myself :)

This week I'm taking Patricia to dinner, celebrating Halloween (we're all really excited to try and explain the concept of a jack o'lantern to the Ugandans), and attending a ton of meetings (which I'm not really looking forward to)

I love you all. Hope life is treating you kindly.